“Worrying does not take away tomorrow’s troubles; it takes away today’s peace.”
Political Stress Disorder
In the US, the 2020 presidential election is presumably done. If you were like me, the past week AND the hundreds of days since Trump won in 2016 have been a whirlwind of emotions.
I’ve had to do a LOT of processing around sexism, racism and narcissism (among other things). I’ve also had to process emotions around the democratic party’s handling of certain events (like the Bret Kavanugh case).
It’s been hard but it’s made me a stronger and better person.
As a white woman, I’m well aware that I’m in a position of privilege to be able to quietly process my own emotions around some of these things vs. experience them firsthand. But, because I’ve been able to process my emotions fully, it’s allowed me to fight harder for things I support with love because I’m not in an emotional tornado of hate.
If you’re someone who feels stuck, if not overwhelmed with your emotions about politics, today’s podcast is for you.
I’m going to teach you how to process your political emotions so you can feel better.
Specifically, I’m teaching you…
SPECIFICALLY I’M TEACHING YOU…
- How to understand the depth of why you feel the way you do & process those feelings so you can get unstuck
- How to get to neutrality with those who disagree with you so you aren’t triggered by them anymore
- How to create a plan of action for how you want to authentically act moving forward
…and so much more
EVERYONE IS WELCOME TO LISTEN TO THIS PODCAST – NO MATTER WHO YOU VOTED FOR. This training is for here to help you process YOUR feelings, not for me to tell you how to think, feel and act.
But, if you are an open and proud racist, sexist, or you’re homophobic then please unsubscribe and unfollow my work.
Podcast link at the top of this page, or watch the training below.
RESOURCES MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
→ Continue the conversation in my free online community
→ Get The 4-Day Accomplish Your Dreams Free Training
→ Watch this training as a video here
Full Transcript
This is the Become an Unstoppable Woman podcast with Lindsay Preston Episode 81,
Processing Politics.
[music]
Welcome to the Become an Unstoppable Woman podcast, the show for goal-getting, fearfacing women for kicking ass by creating change. I’m your host, Lindsay Preston. I’m a wife,
mom of two, and a multi-certified life coach to women all over the world. I’ve lived
through enough in life to know that easier doesn’t always equate to better. We can’t fear
the fire, we must learn to become it. On this show, I’ll teach you how to do just that. Join
me as I challenge you to become even more of the strong, resilient, and powerful woman
you were meant to be. Let’s do this.
[music]
Hi there my friends, well in the US, the 2020 presidential election is presumably that Joe
Biden is the perceived winner. Most of us are moving forward with our lives believing that
to be the truth. If you’re like me, the past few weeks with the election and the hundreds of
days since Donald Trump won in 2016, have been a whirlwind of emotions. I’ve had to do a
lot of processing around sexism, racism, and narcissism among other things. I’ve also had
to process emotions around the Democratic party’s handling of certain events like the
Brett Kavanaugh case.
It’s been hard but it’s made me a stronger and better person, especially mentally. As a
white woman though, I’m well aware that I’m in a position of privilege to be able to
quietly process my own emotions around some of these things versus experience them
firsthand. But because I’ve been able to process my emotions fully, it’s allowed me to fight
harder for things I support with love because I’m not in an emotional tornado of hate. If
you are someone who feels stuck, if not overwhelmed with your emotions about politics,
today’s podcast is for you.
I’m going to teach you how to process your political emotions so you can feel better,
specifically I’m teaching you how to understand the depth of why you feel the way you do
and process those feelings so you can get unstuck. How to get to neutrality with those who
disagree with you so you aren’t triggered by them anymore. Because again, we want to be
able to fight for things that we love with love not with hate. Yes, I also want to teach you
how to create a plan of action for how you want to authentically move forward. We’re
going to cover so much more, everyone, I’m saying this loud for those in the back,
everyone is welcome to listen to this podcast, no matter who you voted for.
This is for anyone beyond the US too. I know wherever you’re at, politics may be a hot
button issue, maybe very triggering for you. Regardless, what I teach you today, you can
apply really anywhere in your life, any area, it’s core stuff that you’ll want to know. This
training is here to help you process your feelings, not for me to tell you how to think, feel,
and act. Although I’m going to be very open about how I vote and my background and
some of the things that I feel and the things that I think. You can find your own thinking
and your own feeling. I’m going to be authentic with you to show you how to be authentic
with yourself. Just know that I’m putting it all out on the table because I want you to be
authentic with yourself.
But I do want to make very clear, I don’t feel like I need to say this but I’m going to, if you
are an open and proud racist, sexist or you’re homophobic, then please unsubscribe and
unfollow my work. That is beyond anything of what I can ever teach you. We are just not a
good value fit. Again, no matter where you fall politically, welcome, let’s learn together.
Let’s process this stuff. Donald Trump was really triggering for me but he may not have
been really triggering for you. That’s okay. I am married to a man who does not think the
same way I do politically and I talk even more about this. This podcast in essence is the
audio from a live training that I recently did. If you don’t know, I go live every Wednesday,
11:15 AM central time on my Facebook page and if you’re on my email list, you get a
private Zoom link to watch me on Zoom.
These trainings just come up here on the podcast every so often, we’re going to take a
break here in a bit for the holidays from these but moving forward, these trainings are
going to be there all the time. I hope you enjoy this audio. I hope you learn a lot from it. I
hope you leave it with so much awareness, so much love and so much peace. All right.
Here it is.
All right as I said, we’re going to talk about how to process emotions with politics today.
Here in the US obviously we just finished an election. Some would say we’re still in the
midst of it. For most of us though, we’re moving forward. We have a new president and
most of us have our senators and house representatives and everything else.
Obviously, Georgia poor thing is going to have a runoff but otherwise it’s pretty much a
done deal. It’s brought up a lot of emotions obviously, since we’ve been in a high political
season. I just want to address that because I want to teach you how to process this stuff no
matter what happens anytime of the year with politics or anything else. Today what I’m
going to teach you doesn’t just apply to politics, it applies to anything in your life that you
need to process the emotions of. Okay, let’s just jump in. What I’m going to teach you first
is something called the self coaching model. If you follow my work, can we move this a
little bit, but if you follow my work closely, then I teach this tool a lot. It’s not a tool that I
have put together. It’s from Brooke Castillo but it’s an amazing one.
What it is, it’s allowing you to bring awareness as to why you’re feeling the way you do
because awareness is always the first step to change. You may think, “Oh Lindsay, I’m
already aware of why I feel the way that I do,” and that’s great but let’s go a little bit
deeper with that because it may be something so much deeper than you ever thought.
Again, we’re going to break this down first and then I’m going to give you examples of
how to use this in regards to politics. All right, with a self-coaching model, you have C-T-FA-R on the side here. C stands for circumstances. Circumstances are things we have no
control over. We have no control over the election results. Now granted, we show up and
we vote.
We may even campaign and do all of those things but at the end of the day, we have no
control over the things that are outside of ourselves. Those are circumstances. Hey, one
that we’ve been talking about a lot lately is something like Coronavirus. We can do our
part and do everything we want to do to help the pandemic but at the end of the day, we
really can’t control that. Then next on the line, we have T and those are thoughts.
Thoughts are just sentences that are in your brain. I want to just take a moment and just
reiterate. Thoughts are sentences in your brain. They’re not facts. They’re not these huge,
powerful things that we give them so much power to. They’re just sentences. You’re going
to see this here in a minute. What I mean by this.
F are your feelings. Feelings are just vibrations in your body based off what you think. A lot
of times we’re so scared of our feelings but at the end of the day, it’s just a vibration. We
don’t want to feel a vibration of sadness. We don’t want to feel a vibration of anxiety.
Again, the end of the day, all it is is something that’s happening to our body. A stands for
actions is what you do or don’t do, pretty straightforward there. Then R is for results. What
happens because of our actions. We’re going to keep using this throughout today’s
training, the self coaching model, but this is one again, you want to take notes on right
here because this is the tool we’re going to continuously go back to time and time again.
We’ve got the C-T-F-A-R.
What we’re going to do next is something called a thought download. This is what I want
you to do in regards to politics. If there is something in politics, so this is again, anything in
your life, we’re just talking about politics today, that is triggering to you. For a lot of
people, Donald Trump is triggering, for other people, Joe Biden is triggering. Republicans,
Democrats, my uncle, Bob who votes, blah, blah, blah. So many different scenarios but
what I want you to do is I want you to again, take the circumstance of whatever’s
triggering to you. Donald Trump, Democrats, Joe Biden and I want you to start to do what
we call thought downloads.
Thought downloads are just all the things that you’re thinking about that circumstance. I’m
going to give you an example of this. I’m going to do it both sides. Republicans, let’s just
look at this side of the spectrum. For a lot of people, when they think of Republicans, they
think thoughts like, they’re racist, they’re two-faced, all they care about is money, they’re
harmful, angry people, like the the media tends to put them in a certain bucket of how
they look and what they do and things of that sort. These are just thoughts that people are
having when they think Republicans.
On the other side of that, some people when they say Democrats, they think too, they’re
two-faced, they think they’re lazy, they’re going to take my money, that’s what I hear a lot
of times, they’re putting our safety at risk because they say things like “Defund the police,”
and stuff like that. Again, get really clear on what it is you are thinking about the
circumstance. You can do this for so many different things. You can say, “Donald Trump
tweets, X.” Whatever he tweets, all the thoughts.
If we go back, and we think about, something Donald Trump said at a recent debate with
the Proud Boys or something like that, like “Stand up and stand down.” I forgot what it
was. Could put that as your circumstance and do your thought download with that. Same
with the Democrats. If you think, “Oh, the Democrats are going to do all this stuff,” you can
put that specifically as your circumstance and what are all the thoughts related to that.
Again, the goal here is awareness, my friend. We want you to bring to the surface, all the
things that you’re thinking, so that you can then decide, “Is this what I really want to think
here?”
I’m going to give you some examples of that. We’re going to take that model again and
we’re going to break it down. I’m going to teach you how to start to use it. This is one I did
specifically with a client just a few days ago. Over 71 million people voted for Donald
Trump. That’s a circumstance. That’s what we know to be true, it’s outside of ourselves.
Something that happens in the world that we have no control over. The thought my client
had was, “They’re racist.” Now she’s thinking, “Oh, my gosh, 71 million people in the United
States are racist.”
Then we go further. When she thinks that thought that they’re racist, the feelings that she
has are anger, disgust, fear, sadness, anxiety. Then I asked her, “When you’re thinking that
thought that they’re racist, 71 million people are racist, and you’re feeling these feelings,
what actions do you start to take?” Because what happens, is our thoughts drive our
feelings, our feelings then drive our actions, our actions become our results. At the end of
the day, what we’re thinking tends to become our result. It might not be immediate, but
over time, the thought becomes a result.
For her, it was spinning my feelings of all of this stuff, spread more hates, which was a
hard pill to swallow for her, feel disgust, fear all that other stuff, or she spreads all that
more. Then the results, so far of that, is she feels like crap, she turns people away that she
wants to help. I give this little example over here of, you’re going to help Christians. I live
in Texas and people here are, I guess in the Bible Belt, is what they call it.
I always think of when I would go downtown, when I was in college, downtown Fort Worth,
there were these people there that were so adamant about Christianity, but the way that
they would, in essence sell it, was if you don’t become a Christian, you’re going to hell and
it scared the crap out of me. [laughs] I grew up in Texas and I have been around that stuff,
but they had just so much hate. The way that they were saying it, it scared me. Even again,
if I wanted to become a part of their message and their tribe or whatever you want to call
it, their people, they came at it from such a place of anger, that it turned me off.
She realized that’s what she’s doing. She’s turning people away that she feels like she
wants to help. Then again, her thought is becoming her reality. It’s like, “They are racist.
They’re not going to understand, they’re not going to get it.” This is the power my friends
of using this tool. It’s tricky and it’s hard at times to see how we are many times
perpetuating the problem that we want to solve. We could flip this model– Did I do
another one? I can’t remember. I did these last night. No, I didn’t. Or we could do another
circumstance here and say, “Joe Biden has won the election.” Or perceived to have won the
election, according to some people.
The thought is– For some people, this is scary. What are they feeling? Scared, anxious,
they probably feel some anger in there, even disgust, all those things. What actions are
they taking? They’re probably spinning in their feelings and they’re probably spreading
more of the feelings that they’re feeling, and so then, their thought of, “This is scary,”
becomes their result line. Their brain is just going to start to focus on all the aspects that
are scary around them and then that’s going to be what they create in the world of, the
next four years are very scary for them.
I just want you, to start to open your mind to using this tool. This is how we start to
process our feelings, my friend. So many people don’t know how to do this. That’s why
they’re stuck in these cycles of anxiety, anger and sadness and all that stuff, because
they’re just not processing everything. Now, something else I want to tell you here,
because your next question, maybe, “Lindsay, what if I really want to just keep thinking
this? What if it’s serving me to think this? That these people are racist, or it’s scary and all
that stuff.” You can think whatever you want to think, but I just want you to ask these
questions to yourself when you’re doing your models.
The questions are, “Is it true?” We go back to the model I just did that they’re racist. Is it
true? Your brain may say, “Yes, it’s true. Here’s all the reasons why.” Then I want you to flip
it and say, “How could it be untrue? How could it be untrue that 71 million people who
voted for Trump aren’t racist?” Then just let your brain go there. This is the hard stuff. My
brain loves to tell me things in black and white terms and your brain does too. This is just
how our brain works. When you have to open your mind to, “How could it be untrue?” Many
times it’s like that mind blowing feeling of, “Pfff.”
Then just start to take that in. Also a question to ask yourself, “How am I projecting or
doing what I don’t like?” If we go back and we look at the thought they’re racist, then you
may be coming out and doing things that are perpetuating racism. It’s just creating more of
a division and more of a problem. I catch myself in this all the time. Next week on the live
training, we’re going to be talking all about judgment and why we have judgments. To give
you a spoiler, the reason why we have judgments, is because we see in ourselves what
we’re judging other people for. That’s a hard pill to swallow.
Obviously, if you’re a person of color, especially a Black person and you’re like, “Well, I’m
calling them racist, how is it that I’m racist? I’m Black.” It’s not all or nothing here of,
“That’s always true,” but it’s very common, that we’re judging other people, because of
things we see in ourselves. The other question I want you to ask yourself, when you’re
pulling your thoughts, “Does it serve me to think this? Does it serve me to think that
they’re racist? Does it serve me to think it’s going to be scary the next four years because a
Democratic is president?” I don’t know. Ask yourself. If it serves you, great, keep it but love
your reasons for keeping that thought.
I tell my clients this all the time, after we use this tool and we dig deeper in it all the time.
I say, “Run your models on it.” They run their models. I say, “Okay. With your thoughts that
you’ve pulled, do you love your reasons for why you want to think that?” Sometimes it’s,
“Yes, I love my reasons. I don’t want to invest in this one thing, because I want to have
more money.” Great. For other people they’re like, “Oh, no, I see that that’s a fear based
thought, I’d rather have this thought instead.” Great, awesome. You can think whatever you
want to think.
I came out recently, over the weekend and I was talking about how so many people on
personal development, which is obviously the industry I’m in, has come out and
congratulated Biden and Harris on their win, and so many people have been offended by
that. Of, “Oh my gosh, unfollow. Unfollow, I don’t want anything to do with you. You
brought politics.” Or, “How could you vote for them?” Or whatever. I have said, most people
on personal development are Democrats. Just like, “Put that in your mindset.” It’s just
because of our industry and what we’re working on the world and we just feel like, the
Democratic Party touches in on some of that stuff.
It’s just so interesting to me how many people get offended by that. If they were to sit and
run their models of– Somebody like Brene Brown has come out. She’s really big in our
industry. Brene Brown has said she supports Joe Biden. That’s the circumstance. The
thought is, whatever the thought, but, “This is BS. I don’t want any part of this.” I even said
some people in the comments would say to certain people they followed forever of like, “I
question everything you’ve ever told me now, because now I know this about you.” It’s like,
“Okay, just run your models on that people. Is that really serving you? Is that really what
you want to think here?” Just ask yourself that.
My last question is, does it serve the world to think that? When you get to a place where
you have developed in your mind management more and more, you’ve done something
like coaching with me or somebody else, like we do life purpose work. For my clients and
myself, we have this life purpose that we know we’re here to spread and deliver in the
world. It’s so great to live that way because it allows you to catch yourself. For me, my
purpose is love and to spread love and to the, world self-love and people loving other
people.
It’s not always easy for me to do that. This is my work of my lifetime, to continue to love
myself and to spread that around the world. When I catch myself being in these judgment
cycles, or, these hate cycles even, I ask myself, “Does it serve the world? Am I really living
my life’s purpose by thinking these thoughts and having these actions.” Most times when
my brain just has those initial negative thoughts, because that’s what our brain does. Our
brain is here to help us survive and thrive.
Anytime somebody goes against us, our brain tends to see it as a threat and then wants to
react. Many times that’s fight or flight. Sometimes it’s a freeze is what research is showing,
but yes. Then it’s like, is this serving the world here? For me, I’m like, “Okay, who I’ve got
that quick little head of anger? Because somebody is going against something or whatever,
this protection mentality.” Okay, Lindsay, I run my model really quick in my head. What am
I thinking here? Okay, here’s the thought, is that true?
Maybe a little bit. How could it be untrue? Here’s the reasons how it could be untrue. Does
this serve me? Does this serve the world? Does this serve my higher purpose? I hope that
is making sense. I feel like I’ve flown through this today because I’ve just been talking
about the model so much in many of my trainings and on my podcast. If you’re a client of
mine, you definitely get this, but I just want to reel everybody in because it’s been a hard
few weeks, especially.
For some people it’s been a hard few years. For a lot of my clients, myself included, Donald
Trump has been extremely triggering. I’m going to go to this next page. A trigger is any
emotion that lasts more than seven seconds. Any negative emotion. A negative emotion is
anything we deem as like shame, humiliation, sadness, anger, disgust, frustration. You can
call it like the icky feelings, the things that just feel really uncomfortable in your body.
Anything that lasts more than seven seconds, that’s a trigger. A trigger means that there is
a deeper trauma to process from your past with that. Let’s define trauma for a second
because a lot of times we think trauma is like these big, huge things that happen to us.
Some sort of abuse, is typically where our brain goes, but trauma really is any time that
you just felt unsafe. That happens a lot of times. Some people’s brains are just more
sensitive than others. This is the newest research that’s come out about this.
Some people have these brains that are just more highly emotional. For a lot of my clients,
it’s the ones that test high in empathy. Again, they’re just more sensitive, and so they have
more trauma that they need to process. Because of that, they’re getting triggered a lot
more. I’m one of those people, I have a sensitive brain. I am a sensitive person. I knew this
thing. Goodness. Whenever Donald Trump was really triggering to me because he
reminded me a lot of men that I used to date.
He would say something and it would be very triggering, and then I would say, “Okay.” In
essence, I would run my models. Donald Trump says X, Y, Z. Let me give you a specific
example. You remember, years ago when it came out that video and Donald Trump had
said, grab her by the P or whatever word. That was triggering to me at the time. I was like,
“Okay, what is triggering about this?” It brought up all of these times that I had, especially
in college. I went to TCU, which is Texas Christian University.
I thought going into that school, that it was a Christian school and it was just for a lot of
go-getters. But what I got when I got there was there was a lot of entitlements. There was
a lot of racism. There was a lot of sexism that was going on behind the scenes. I was just
completely out of my element when I went there. I was like this little sheltered girl. I
hadn’t even seen like a rated R movie. I’d never had alcohol.
When I got there and all this stuff was happening and these guys, especially, were saying
comments similar to what Trump said. It felt really scary to me at the time. I mean, there
were even girls that were getting date raped and we would just all brush it under the rug
and just be like, “Oh, well, you shouldn’t have done that so-and-so,” and make it her fault.
Again, it brought up all this stuff for me of all these times that I felt unsafe, but nobody
else was really like deeming it as “bad behavior”.
It brought up, again, all this stuff that I needed to process with that. Keep that in mind for
you. If you’re holding on to some feelings that are lasting more than seven seconds, there’s
deeper stuff there. With my clients, what I’m doing is they’re aware enough, they’re coming
to me and they’re saying, “Okay, Lindsay, this thing happened.” If we go back and we look
at the model that we talked about a bit ago with what was it, 70 million people voted for
Trump. She knew, “Hey, this has been a triggering thing for me.”
She’s a woman of color, and she’s like, “I just feel like they’re racist.” Then we know we run
our model and we see how it’s not serving her to think that, and we’re digging deeper. It’s
like, “Okay, what’s really going on here. What’s the trauma here?” That’s where we get the
good stuff. That’s where we get to really then start to look at, “Okay, what do we need to
process here?” For a lot of people, they think, “Oh, that’s going to take much time for me to
process my trauma, and it’s going to feel like crap, and I’m not going to want to do that.”
All of that stuff. A lot of reasons why you can feel that way, is maybe you’ve had a therapy
experience where it did take a lot longer. Sometimes, we just need that. In my coaching
practice, we do it pretty quickly. I teach them how to fully process their emotions. For
some of them they’re able to release and heal trauma in just a matter of doing a couple of
writing exercises. It’s pretty crazy cool how it works. It doesn’t really take that much time.
The other thing is, why. Initially you think, “Oh, trauma, I don’t want to go and explore this
stuff and feel this stuff.” Is because that’s just the human brain, the human brain does not
want to feel stuff at all. They would rather feel numb and avoid that stuff. But what
happens then is that you’re carrying that crap around. I always talk about like, you have a
hundred pound backpack.
Hey, with all this stuff in your bag, all these little traumas, sometimes big traumas of
things that have happened to you and you think, “Oh, I’ve grown up, I’ve moved past that.
I’ve moved on.” But then, you’re not having massive momentum in your life. You’re not
feeling good. You’re not just doing all the things that you want to do. That’s because you
got all this stuff on your back. When I coach with people and when I experienced coaching
firsthand as a client, many years ago, I just kept thinking, as I was processing this stuff, I
just feel so much lighter.
I feel so much more free. This feels so great. I was able to experience more of a life where
I was feeling joy and peace and gratitude and acceptance and love. It felt natural. It didn’t
feel like some sort of avoidance show or, people can call it like Pollyanna like. It felt very
authentic to feel that way is because I was learning how to process all of this stuff. Then
too a new stuff would come up. Like I said, Donald Trump would say something or
somebody else would do something.
I’d be like, “Okay, I know something deeper here. I know how to process that.” I start to run
my models, like I just showed you. Then say, “Okay, what is this really about?” Yes. Hey, is
this making any sense? I hope so. If you have questions, you can always reach out to me,
especially via email if you want privacy. My email is Lindsay, L-I-N-D-S-A-Y, epreston.com
or, [email protected]. If you are like, “Okay, I know I’ve got deeper stuff here,
Lindsay. I know I’m ready to change. I’m ready to create some massive results in my life.”
Then I encourage you to look into applying for a free consult call, so we can talk even
more about where you’re at in life right now and where you want to go. My coaching
process is nine months long. The first three months of that process, we are in essence,
getting rid of all the things that are holding you back. We’re doing a lot of processing, a lot
of feeling, dealing, and healing, as I say. Then you have that process for life of knowing
how to always process things and emotions and traumas and all of that stuff because life
is what it is.
I can make life so much better for you because you’re going to be in a more authentic
place as we coach together and stuff, but things still happen. You’ve got to know how to
get over those things and come to the world being your most authentic best self, because,
A, I know you want that. I know you want to give something bigger to the world or at least
I know I did for a while. Then two, you want to be able to probably feel better for yourself.
It doesn’t feel good to hold on to this stuff, especially when it comes to politics, because at
the end of the day, sometimes I can get like this and just spin in the emotion of it. Ask my
husband, oh my gosh. Him and I, we don’t agree on everything politically. We have some
little heated talks about stuff. It’s just so nice to know that I know how to process my
feelings and do all of these things. I remember too, this is just politics. Like who is it that I
really want to be? Who is it that I really want to show up as?
Then I start to really think about too, what are the causes that mean the most to me, and it
doesn’t serve me or these causes sitting around in these emotions. I need to process this
stuff and then I need to get up and I need to get to work and I need to go and I need to
make change if that’s donating money or donating my time, or just donating awareness, in
essence, like my services to help people process this stuff. It’s just such a different way of
living and it feels so much better. Again, if you feel like, I’m ready for more, I’m ready to
finally process this stuff, apply for free consult lindsayepreston.com/apply. I would love to
learn about you and see if coaching can help you.
As I said, the first three months of that process is processing all the things that are holding
you back, the next three months is figuring out who you are on a really deep level and
planning out your life. For a lot of people that come to me and say, “I don’t know where I
want to go next in my life, Lindsay. I’ve checked off all of these boxes and I’ve done things
so well. I’m at a place where it’s like, what’s next?” For some, they want a career change or
they want to up-level in certain ways.
We build that plan and then the last three months is just getting into massive action and
learning how to make quick decisions and managing your mind as you’re up-leveling your
life. It’s really fun and it’s amazing and it’s so crazy cool to see how much you can change
in nine months. It all starts going back to learning how to process your emotions. I can’t
say that enough. I wish they taught this stuff in school. I wish every teacher was sitting
down and saying, here’s the model, and here’s how this stuff works. Even on the play yard.
It’s like Billy pulls her hair on the play yard. The thought is I’m ugly.
In our childhood brain is so emotional and so that’s why so many of us walk out of
childhood with these traumas because even little things of somebody being mean to us on
the playground or a teacher saying a certain thing about us. Like my daughter, she came
home a few months ago and she found out the boy that she likes likes somebody else. She
just came in the car and she was bawling and she said, “Mom, what’s wrong with me?” I
was able to kind of, in essence, walk her through this. She didn’t quite know it, but I said,
“Okay, so-and-so likes so-and-so, the thought is what’s wrong with me?
Like baby is that really true? How could it be untrue here?” Then we found all the reasons
of how it could be untrue. I said, “Is that serving you to think so?” “No, it’s not.” I had to
reassure her, give her some mentoring in that moment. It’s like, no, here’s all the reasons
why it’s not wrong with you. Then she went from probably feeling, I don’t know what she
was feeling. Maybe shame to feeling neutral and then probably feeling empowered and
feeling self-acceptance and self-love from that and taking action from a different place.
Again, you can use this tool all over the place. It’s amazing tool. As I said, it’s not my zone
of genius, it’s Brooke Castillo’s. She runs a life coach school, but it’s one that I adore and I
hope you will use it. I hope you’ll use it to do thought downloads of whatever
circumstance happens and just write down all your thoughts about it and then ask
yourself, do I really want to keep thinking this, is it serving me to think of that? If it’s not,
then what do I want to think instead? If we go back to the example I gave a moment ago
with the model I do with my clients. They’re all racist and she realized she was taking
action and getting results from that place. Then I thought, I said, “What thought do you
want to think?”
The thought that she wanted to think was, “I’m here to help. I’m here to educate. I’m here
to be the best me and nobody’s going to hold me back.” Even she wanted to think thoughts
of I’m safe, I’m secure. That’s a big one, especially for people of color, they have those
kinds of thoughts. That wasn’t serving her to think that she’s always like on edge. That’s
intentionally and truly what she wanted to think here and then she felt more peace and
neutrality and love for herself and for others.
Then she’s going to take action from that place and then create probably a lot more results
from that. I just listened to a podcast from my business coach Stacy Boehman, she’s
basically a business coach for life coaches. I forget the term that she used on her podcast,
but she was talking about how in the coaching industry sometimes we can kind of diss on
one another in order for some of us to look better. It got me thinking about in our country
and even in our world, sometimes we like to disown one another in order for our cause to
come up looking better. We want to disown racist, or we want to disown Democrats or
whatever.
The reality is that’s only making it harder for us to get the results that we want here. The
examples she gave us, she was talking about women in the US getting their right to vote.
There were two different women at the time, Susan B. Anthony was one and I forget the
other one, but they were both working on getting women the right to vote but they both
were kind of at odds with each other because they just kept saying like, you’re doing it
wrong.
No, you’re doing it wrong and you’re doing it wrong. It took them so much longer,
something like 60 years to get women the right to vote from the time they started to the
time it happened and because they were just fighting among each other the whole time
versus, “Okay, let’s come together and let’s figure out a way to make this work.” Again, take
away what you want from this, think the thoughts that you want to think. You’re always
welcome to think whatever you want.
So many people are like, “Well, Lindsay you’ve come out and you said that you voted for
Biden.” I like to put myself out there on the table and be authentic because I want you to
feel safe to be authentic. If you voted a different way, that’s totally your call. I’m not here
to tell you how to think. I just want to show you what you’re thinking, to take the actions
you are, to create the results that you are and why you’re feeling the way you feel. You do
you. Obviously, I have my boundaries. If someone’s coming to me and they’re racist or
homophobic or sexist, like we’re not going to work together, but otherwise it’s like, I want
you to just be the most authentic you ever.
I want you to feel authentic, to open up to me and do all those things and feel safe and all
that. Just know that please, please, please and you have to know too I’m here in Texas. I
am surrounded by people who think different from me, as I said, my husband and I don’t
agree on everything. I am totally used to being the minority here when it comes to
thinking the way that I think. I’m just used to it. I am totally cool if you think different, but
just make sure you love your reasons for whatever you think the way you do and make sure
that it’s really serving you to think that the way you do.
Again, if you have any questions, email me. If you feel like you want to take this deeper
and you want to start coaching with me, lindsayepreton.com/apply, but I hope you gained
something today that you will take and use time and time again. I’ll talk to you hopefully
again soon, bye.
[music]
Hey there, Miss Unstoppable. Thanks so much for tuning into this episode. If you enjoyed
it, share it with a friend. Send them a picture of this episode via text, via email, share it on
social media, I’m sure they would be so appreciative to know these strategies and tips on
how to accomplish your dreams. If you are ready to guarantee you’re going to accomplish
your goals and dreams, then it’s time to start coaching with me.
In my nine-month simple success coaching system, I am going to walk you every single
step of the way to ensure that you get the goals and dreams that you want. The first step is
to apply for a free 60-minute consult call. Just go to LindsayEpreston.com/apply to get
started. As always, my friend, remember, you’re only as unstoppable as you believe you can
be, so believe in yourself. You got this.
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